The Bruce Willis ready reckoner
The long awaited arrival of Mr Willis into the Den Of Geek ready reckoner chair. Yippee-ky-ay....
I bloody love Bruce Willis I do. He’s a genre-spanner, lending his hand to action, comedy, er, action-comedy, sci-fi and suspense. He also made my favourite film of all time. Even I have to it though, it’s not all been a bed of roses for Bruno…
Blind Date

Bruce back when he was young and charming.
Die Hard

Words cannot express how much I love this film. Flawless. Absolutely flawless.
Look Who’s Talking

Actually quite a funny film, although it hasn’t aged well
Die Hard 2

Bye bye Hans. Hello Colonel Stuart. Guns, explosions and the immortal line, “HOLLY! There’s your fucking landing light!” Genius.
Look Who’s Talking Too

Sweet Georgia Brown.
The Bonfire of the Vanities

Hmm. The start of many dubious choices by Bruno
Hudson Hawk

The Last Boy Scout

Death Becomes Her

And the brain cells of anyone watching. Dire
Striking Distance

One of Willis’s distinctly average thrillers. Most notable for making me want to pee all the way through it.
Pulp Fiction

Overrated film perhaps, but Willis has the best role.
Color of Night

Bruce does soft porn. Bad, bad film. She’s pretty fit though.
Die Hard: With A Vengeance

Worst of the four, but the interplay between Sam Jackson and Willis is worth watching. Jeremy Irons makes a play for the least scary villain ever portrayed on film.
Twelve Monkeys

Great film for all concerned.
Last Man Standing

Probably his best work other than Die Hard. A gem of a movie and one I can (and have) watch again and again.
The Fifth Element

Continuing a purple patch of output, another great performance in another eminently watchable flick.
The Jackal

And the purple patch comes to an end as silly get-ups and ridiculous accents do not a thriller make
Mercury Rising

Average.
Armageddon

A film I watched just before breaking up with my then girlfriend. An unhappy experience for reasons other than just that though, not least the fright of my life at seeing Liv Tyler’s huge hand on that monitor. Overlong and frankly dull for large patches.
The Siege

Controversial at the time, a fairly average film with fairly average performances.
The Sixth Sense

Doesn’t stand up so well with repeat viewing but that first viewing was so good.
The Story of Us

I should love it as it also stars Michelle Pfeiffer, a woman with whom I have a deep crush upon. I don’t however. Because it’s poo.
Unbreakable

M Night Shyamalan’s best film to date.
Bandits

A nice little film that I don’t think got the audience it deserved.
Hart’s War

Didn’t like it much.
Tears of the Sun

Ditto.
Hostage

Not as good as I thought it would be
Sin City

Above average film, but even I have to it Bruce was miscast. He’s the worst thing in it.
Die Hard 4

Apart from the last 20 minutes (surfing on a plane? Really?) my second favourite of the series.
Not seenIn Country (Me neither – Simon)Mortal Thoughts (Not bad, three stars – Simon)Breakfast of Champions (Dreadful – Simon)The Whole Nine Yards (Dreadful – Simon)The Whole Ten Yards (Dreadful – Simon)16 Blocks (Not bad, perfectly serviceable action flick – Simon)Perfect Stranger (Didn’t look great, did it? – Simon)